Sigh. Who am I kidding? I just need to be held. I don't think I've ever really been held. I want the 'It's okay because you're safe now and you're the only one in the world that matters' type of holding and comfort. And that's something that only Jim can give me. And considering he's 1700 miles away, this makes me want to scream, cry, and possibly sleep for days upon days. I don't like this feeling of loneliness that I carry around with myself every day, I don't like not being able to go home to my love, and I especially don't like falling asleep and waking up all alone.

Agh. I gotta stop this before I make myself cry or something.

So ya know that whole psychological thing where negative people wear little rubberbands on their wrists so that when they catch themselves being negative, they can snap the rubberband, turn it into a positive thought, and eventually wean themselves into being more positive people? No? Oh.. Right.. Well, my Public Speaking instructor told us about it and it's supposed to work. So I'm trying it out. I'm my own guinea piggy. :) Let us all hope it actually does some good, ya know? Hehe. 'Cause, really, who can say I'm not one of the most negative people ever?

On the way home from work tonight, I called up Matt to just see how things were going for him. I hadn't spoken with him in like 3 weeks and I haven't seen him in like a month and a half. It was nice to chat with him for a bit. :) Since I'm off Tuesday, I suggested we hang out or something. He sounded excited. Hehe. I love that guy. I can't wait to see him. I've missed him so much and I absolutely love his hugs. I'm so looking forward to our hanging out. Now, what should we do? Rent movies and order pizza? Or should we go out of town and find something to do in Florence or some place? Dunno.

I really don't have much else to say and I'm super-tired so I think I'll end this now. I have to work 10 hours tomorrow anyway and definitely need more sleep than I got last night. Take care, everyone!

past - future